Do They Really Think We Go Stupid Over Summer?
One of the many reasons I enjoy my summer (or any other time) on Gabriola is due to the absence of television. I always swear that this year will be different; I won’t go back to watching the idiot tube in Calgary. But I do. And every year it seems that advertisers treat us as if all of that sun and fun of summer has addled our brains. I swear that they think we went stupid over the summer.
I buy bottled water. Sometimes I even buy it because I like the pretty bottle. I know that only a fool would spend his money on something he can get free from his tap (in Calgary, at least), but sometimes I just need a drink of water and a bottle is the most convenient way to get it. But please don’t remind me that I am spending my money on “nothing.” This is what one popular water company is selling: “Nothing.” No additives, no fats, no calories. Nothing. Do they think that we are so naive that we will buy into the benefits of paying for nothing? Spell the word “naïve” backward and you will get a good chuckle. (I learned this from someone more cynical than I am; I’m really not that clever!)
I grew up on ketchup, more specifically, Heinz ketchup. Why can’t they leave it alone. First they monkey around with the colour and now it’s with the flavours. I don’t want my ketchup to taste like garlic or mesquite or hot sauce. Ketchup should be sweet and vinegary. That’s all. If I want other flavours, I will add them myself or use one of the myriad of part-used sauces I can find in the back of my fridge. I should have thought that by now manufacturers would have figured out that we don’t like our standards tampered with. Remember all of the trouble Coke had when they messed with their classic recipe.
Speaking of Coke, I wonder how Vanilla Coke will fare. From early reports that I get from our service staff who have worked functions where we have supplied this new product, adults find it far too sweet. Jordan tried some last night because it came free with our pizza. He also found it unpalatable. I suppose that teens are the targeted market. Oh, great! Just what we need; more ways for the kids to fill up on empty calories and caffeine.
The world of snack-food marketing is a war zone, with the consumer on the losing end. It seems that as our knowledge of health and nutrition increases, there is a directly proportional increase in the size of the junk food aisle at the supermarket and the weight of our children. Common sense tells us that this should be an inverse relationship. Boy, are those advertisers good at their jobs! How many possible ways are there to re-invent the tortilla chip? Everyone keeps trying to come up with the best shape to enhance our dipping pleasure. I personally thought that they were taking a step in the right direction with the bite-sized chips. At least with these, you didn’t run the risk of cutting the corners of your mouth as you stuffed the whole chip into your mouth to avoid dumping salsa into your lap. But, apparently, this just wasn’t ergonomic enough, and one company now has tiny little chip bowls so that you can really make a mess if the thing breaks and drops. Just how much salsa do you really need on a chip! To make things worse, it is virtually impossible to fill this bowl without sticking your fingers into the salsa itself. I can think of one or two people who I would not wish to share this experience with.
Food storage is and has always been a really, really big issue, especially for those adorably dim-witted female homemakers portrayed in television commercials. Do you remember the stand-alone storage baggies that would allow you to pour a large pot of left-over chilli into them without making a mess? Why were they using a bag anyway; what’s wrong with good old Tupperware? I have always used what I call “shower caps” for bowls. These elasticized plastic bowl covers come in packages of twelve various sizes and cost about $1.50 at the dollar store. They usually have patterns of fruits or vegetables on them and can be cleaned in the dishwasher. I could have dropped when I saw one manufacturer of food wrap come up with disposable covers and act like it was a novel idea. As with nutrition, the facts on disposables and their impact on the environment are indisputable, and yet, manufacturers keep coming up with newer disposables and we keep buying them. I will be the first to admit that I am a strong supporter of the zip-lock bag, but I do re-use them whenever possible. Often I am buying them for non-food applications. They make excellent protective bags for pocket books or matches when you go boating, but I try not to make a habit of supporting this industry, honest!
These are just a few of the insulting attacks on my intelligence which I have endured in the past few weeks as I have become re-urbanized. I will probably not even notice them in a few more weeks; I will tune out the garbage as I have done in the past. But it was lovely to have a commercial break for the summer.
The worst part of this whole annoying business is that even the most ridiculous and inane commercials seem to work. You don’t have to like an ad or even pay total attention to it, for it to leave its mark. When you go to the supermarket, watch yourself and see how many times you automatically reach for a brand name product before one that isn’t advertised as much. It’s truly frightening. And the next time you stay in a motel or hotel, take home the shower cap. It is great for food storage!